so where from here

Well everything that I have tried hasn't worked worth of crap but here I'm am picking up what is left of me and trying therapy again with a Licensed Professional not some 2 bit quack that loves to hear themselves speak and have a good feeling why I have been left out here and Ignored for days . But won't get into that crap, and people wonder why and how I have anxiety issues ... well guess what I figured out a trigger. BEING IGNORED especially at a time that I need to talk and get shit out I'm left alone in the garage for days with no real human interaction not even with my kids and one of them the other day was talking to me HIS MOTHER but said "but mom said..." and with him knowing full well what's going on 🤔🤷‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️ that struck a nerve. 
 I'm at a point in the book that I'm writing that I need some emotional support and they topic I would rather not talk to them about it, well till they read the book at least. I can get a few words out but I stop cause I just need to talk to someone every time that I have tried to just get this out and the thoughts and emotions they are too much to handle on my own and I don't need or want to be scorned for what I AM FEELING, they are mine, they might be a bit screwed in their application but they are MINE none the less, and I need help in processing cause when I have tried I keep ending back in the same dayum spot again and I can't keep doing this, but idk wth is gonna happen cause Friday is just an intake and then its a bunch of other crap before I can ever get into what happens and that could be days if not weeks before I can actually get to deal with anything. Hurry up and wait , we'll probably would be a help of a lot better with a fu@#ing support system but right now I have me myself and I... 
AND THATS A VERY SCARY THING. 

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